One day she’d asked herself: “What is it that, I have to hide? Why can I not be more open about anything?”
Author: Agata Tothova, the founder of project Empower Yourself and Others
Let me introduce an ordinary person’s extraordinary story.
A loving mother of a precious son and adorable daughter, an experienced teacher, trainer and facilitator, a Qualified Confidence coach trained with John Seymour NLP, a sister, a daughter and a passionate and affectionate individual and friend, Helene Musso.
Born in France and having two degrees in History and Polical Science under her belt, in 1989 she decided to leave for Great Britain. Her knowledge of English language was not particularly great then, yet within just few years, she had set up a theatre group under the name of ‘Red Balloon’.
She trained to become a teacher and started teaching in schools and colleges in 1993.
Being involved with a number of Creative projects, including Creative partnership which was the then government flagship creative programme and, developing her skills as a trainer with Mathilda Joubert, Hélène was still feeling inadequate but appearing perfectly confident on the outside. There was still a fear in speaking up showing up within her.
Her current work comes from her own hang ups about speaking. As a teacher, she used to feel confident in front of her classes but felt terrified speaking in front of her peers. She often felt, she was not up to the job, a feeling that is called the ‘Imposter Syndrome’, in which, one always feels a ‘fraud’ , and that at some point someone is going to find out how terrible one is at their job.
Her tongue kept being knotted and she did not contribute as much as she could have done in the training, with her colleagues. This held her promotion back and eroded her self-esteem over time. At some point, she knew she had to change, so she set up a ‘Public Speaking Demystified’ in 2014 and the rest is history.
She used to think that success was based on money and a very good job. Since, we live in a society that values materialistic stuff, the questions that need to be asked without any guilt attached to them, are these;
*Can success mean being a good mum/father or a fantastic cook in your home?
*Do we feel recognised enough being a home stay mother/father or do we need work to make us feel valued?
The solution lies with more awareness of ourselves, mixed with the total acceptance that we are human beings and therefore not perfect. Meanwhile, surrounding ourselves with people who understand us and who are able to love us just the way we are.
Hélène used to lie to avoid hurting someone else’s feelings. These were small lies, OK! She is not good at lying and got caught often! It used to go a bit like this; She did not want to go to a gathering, so she made up that The Car Has Broken Down! and got away with it and she never made up small lies again.
One day she’d asked herself: ” What is it that, I have to hide? Why can I not be more open about anything? Why do I have to invent a story, instead of being honest with myself and others?”. This experience has taught her a lesson of never to promise anything, she cannot keep!
Today, Hélène is motivated by helping others ranging from young to old to feel more confident in themselves. At ‘Public Speaking Demystified’ , she works with women, new and inexperienced managers in companies and foreign nationals like herself, who have to take on new challenges in their personal and professional lives, and those who need support in developing their confidence.
Seeing their transformation and realising that it is partly thanks to her, gives her a great satisfaction to continue what she is unique at.
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She has recently published a book titled ‘The Power of Outrageous Expression‘ that reveals the necessary tools and techniques to overcome the fear of speaking in public and, life in general.
More about gorgeous Hélène, please visit her website www.helenemusso.co.uk